My wife's medical appointment...

My wife and I attended a medical appointment to see what could be done about having a baby. After several years of trying and doing everything that's been possible to aid this process, they've decided to give her injections so long as she loses some weight and gets in the optimum conditions.
To celebrate the breakthrough (after several setbacks we're glad to have anything positive) we met up with a friend and had a couple of drinks before having a meal together. It's amazing how a bit of news and a change of venue will completely lift the mood.
In the back of my mind I was thinking that going out as a family will be amazing. I guess taking a new born out will be daunting and awesome at the same time. In some ways I never would like a child to grow up and give up being a child, in other ways, I can't wait to be able to teach them and even learn things from them. I know it's a bit of a way to go still but having an addition to the family will be amazing.

Handling disappointment about being turned down for a new job

I recently heard through the grapevine that they were looking for an editorial person to join the team at my office. I took the chance to email the editor to see if I would stand a look in. I get the reply to say that I'd joined the game too late as they'd already hired the person... I think this is such a joke as jobs should be advertised and then people should have a chance to approach the people and state their case if interested.

So as soon as I heard this I just thought that as one door closed another will open and it'll lead to a better place.

Taking time to de-stress proves fruitful

It's fair to say with all the strain of working to unachievable targets and singled out for promotion that never seems to evolve into anything and resolving problems at work has taken an unhealthy toll on other aspects of my life. It's really important to have a moment to clear things up and take a step back to look at everything properly. At times like these you really can assess just how priorities can be topsy-turvy and I am glad I can get things cleared up in my own mind before I can work sensibly on moving in the right direction.
My wife and I are talking about setting up our own business now as we've seen too many good opportunities pass by and between us, our skills could really complement what we are interested in doing.
There's a difference between a job and a career, a role and a passion. Don't sell yourself short! - We don't intend to!

Train2Game / Train 2 Game / Train to Game - SCAM

As you may have read from an earlier blog, I had an 'interview' and I can now reveal who it's for - Train2Game.
This interview is such a farce. It starts with signing up, then you get a call from their call centre who try to 'vet' you as a suitable candidate. Pretty much whatever you say will be turned into a positive spin to convince you both that it's something you want. They then arrange for an interview to be held at your home with one of their course administrators.
The salesman - I mean, course administrator, comes round and as long as they see you're willing to sign your life away then you'll pass this 'thorough' process (confirming name, address, telephone number, current job, reason for applying and which role you wish to apply for/which role they wish you to apply for). Again, as long as you have a bit of personality, you will be put forward to their reviewing panel.
Aparently this reviewing panel is done with course directors who'll review your application and as long as the administrator puts in a good word for you, you'll be accepted.
The second phase then begins with high pressure tactics to ensure you sign up. I did get fairly upset by the approach the administrator took when visiting the first time - basically flashing snippets from The Sun newspaper as fact on the state of the gaming industry and then showing me a 6 minute DVD about becoming an animator and how great TIGA (the gaming authority in the UK - who also run the Train2Game programme) are. If alarm bells aren't ringing at this stage then surely you should try to get a second opinion.
Thankfully speaking with my brother and looking about online, we find that actually Train2Game are a dictatorship and scam of the highest order. Sure you may get the tools of the trade and foot in the competitive games industry, but all that really matters is for them to sign up as many people as possible on the promise of giving you a foot in the door once qualified (and you can repeat any exams you fail until you pass them). I was told at the interview how the software they offer are worth about £10k and you can buy them at the end of the course for about £1500.
The main thing that stinks about all this is you are trying to get yourself up the first rung of a ladder and make a career for yourself. Being promised so many things is such an easy thing but when you're not left any paperwork to mull over and all they really want to do is call up to say "you passed the initial phase, congratulateions! Now we have to source the funding for your course..." and hey presto, they can give you a loan which you pay off in weekly instalments (around £40 a week). If you do the maths that's £6240 over the 3 years.
As I know through sales you break things down to the ridiculous level so that people are like 'wow what a cracking offer!' e.g. it works out as a box of fags or couple of pints a day!
After doing some research I find that the parent company offers loans. They also have a highly aggressive stance in terms of snuffing out any negative articles about their company or courses (hence the dictatorship comment previously). I'm sure they'll either try to snuff this blog out or monitor it or try to put out some convincing article.
Anyway to draw a line under this blog, the salesman who never introduced himself properly (i.e. he never mentioned his name) has called me repeatedly to try and sign me up to the course. The pressure became crazy with having an initial interview on Thursday, a call on Friday to say congratulations, now we need to sign you up and get the funding tomorrow (Saturday), to a few calls today (Sunday) to state we need to sign up on Monday as he's going to have to work on another area and the course process goes all over again.
The amount of conflicting reasons as to why I should sign up to it by Saturday (and now Monday) are shameful. Everything from "Your course position will be given to someone else who really wants it" to "You must sign up now to secure funding" and "I need to see you tomorrow as I'm working on another area and you're very lucky to be accepted onto the course!" with a touch of "You can't do this specialist course anywhere else and it'll cost you much more doing it at university" was adopted by the salesman.
Another thing worth looking into is how really accepted is the paperwork you're offered at the successful completion of the course? From what I can see, it's not anything too special but they (TIGA) would like you to believe so and of course if you flood the market with people who have these skills, the industry will tend to tow the line by taking them onboard - therefore making it the industry standard.
In truth, you can gain the skills for free online and if you adopt a disciplined approach and are dedicated, you'll be able to keep up with (or surpass) the standards this course offers.
So don't sign your life away with these scammers, you will find much more useful information about this company and its set up by digging around. I imgaine the real reason why they want you to sign up within days is to prevent you from looking around and securing another deal.
The salesman needs to change their tactics as he slammed the phone down on me when all I said was "If the course is open all year round, I may wish to sign up in a couple of months or whatever". Now poor customer service and bad attitude is something that takes nothing to address.
I only hope you find this in good time prior to signing up.

Back to the drawing board...

I decided from a young age I'd keep education down to a minimum as there's no substitute for experience over academia. Whenever it's crucial to train and learn new skills it's good to get a mixture of learning through doing it rather than just burying your head in books. I know that what looks good on paper does help you avoid making the same mistakes, but too often you hear about people who've gone through university only to end up flipping burgers to pay off their debts and normally end up in something completely unrelated to what they studied.
It's funny how so many people have a dream in their heads and then never choose to follow it. My wife said to me yesterday that people walk away from a dream for a reason, which got me thinking - there are too many excuses (nearly all bad ones) for why you will sell yourself short.
Take my job for example, it's not where I wished to be by this stage. Perhaps it's a dream to be happy and doing something you love and indeed getting paid for it is the real treat! Reading a few books, looking about online and researching things through speaking with honest folk who will tell you how it is makes all the difference. Just today I had a visit from an educational set up which are looking to help me follow my artistic passions and potentially through a course with them and give me assistance in getting a job at the end of it. I'll keep you posted with if I get in or not... but let's hope so!

Game Review Request - apps suggestions needed!

I write iPod/iPhone apps reviews and I'm looking for some inspiration either to cover a game someone has or would like to get some advice on prior to getting.

Taking the bull by the horns

It's amazing what a difference a day makes. I woke up this morning reluctantly peeling back the sheets to be greeted by the cold air - get prepped for work, kiss the wife as normal and begrudgingly leave for a day in the office. As usual I'm greeted by the blank stares and emotionless faces of the commuters on the tube so I crank up the volume on my mobile and listen to some Prodigy and whatever else that happens to be on it to fire myself up for the next few hours.
Get to the office eventually and the thought occurs to me as I check my email on my mobile for the last time before 9am kicks off, "I sure hope I get something from some of the recent applications I sent off!"
The day drags on until around lunch time when I spy that I've got some emails - one asking me to go into an interview at no notice (why do they always assume I've got no commitments?) and another interested in what I can do for them. I make the time to quickly respond before calling my wife and catch up on the important stuff.
A person who I'd dealt with yesterday for losing her 20 year old cat called in to say that she'd found the cat! My reaction was utter joy as you could tell this pet was a real member of the family and I know from experience when a cat goes out and doesn't go back, you always fear the worst.
Funnily enough she asked me to change the Lost Cat advert she'd been looking to place to a huge thank you to the person who found her pet, the neighbours for putting up with her badgering them and the community for being so supportive! I was really amazed that someone would take the time to do something like this and it put what really matters suddenly come into focus.
After that of course the powers that be decide to implement more sanctions and put more effort in bringing down the spirits of the office and I did my best to keep my head down and make it through to the final whistle.
Checking my mail again I discover my wife's been beavering away finding me other jobs worth applying for and when I get home I am straight into applying to them as soon as I've finished my tea and taking a break to do our workout at the gym.
It's so scary how quickly the time flies by and before I know it, we're already tomorrow and I'm sure after an all too short sleep, another eventful day ensues. I'll keep you posted!

Changing the rules at work, yet again to suit the ones on top...

It's funny, you might imagine that after several years working in the media (but it's not just in this industry), it may dawn on you that what matters to yourself seldom really makes a jot of difference to the powers that be! However, we never really worry about it as indeed usually we're all too busy wrapped up in just keeping our heads above water as it is.
So when push comes to shove and your manager takes it upon themself to milk you for your time and kick you in the teeth for your efforts financially, do you decide to take it or try do something about it? It's easy to say which one we should do but it seems as though we are all inclined especially in hard times like these to just accept it and roll over.
Fortunately there are times that really push us to do extraordinary things and we often discover that what doesn't break us down, actually more often, makes us a renewed and improved person. It's always amusing to see how a boss handles someone who can really see right through their nonsense.
I know in some respects I'm always a lit fuse in terms of attitude - quietly bubbling away doing my own thing almost regardless of the manager's interferance (after all, who's really working on the coalface and knows which way is up?) After having meetings for the sake of meetings, targets moved higher and higher with the aim of ensuring the money that you should be entitled to stays firmly in the pockets of the business and not your own, then when all else fails, you get threatened with having your job reviewed if you fail to hit these targets, and yet somehow being reminded that they're looking after your best interests and it's a fair working relationship despite the fact they promote people in the workplace illegally (e.g. not advertising the position for people to apply for, and managing people out of the business if their face doesn't fit). It's fair to say that most who have their head screwed on will find this unacceptable and will decide to walk.
There's quite a few linchpin characters in the office I work who have all handed in their notice and I have to say it's only a matter of time until all they're left with is inexperienced school leavers who won't realise they can find anything better until a bit later. I suppose this is the benefit of a capitalist workforce though?
Hmm well, the words of Pink Floyd's The Wall spring to mind quite a bit in instances like this... but hey, this isn't going to get me down and indeed I'll find ways to explore and develop new avenues! Some positive thing to remind yourself - Every day in every way, I'm getting better and better!

Game Reviews

One of the things I do for a hobby and entertainment is writing reviews of mobile phone games. I really enjoy doing these and it's not such a bad 'job' getting to play games and then write about them. It's a bit of a balancing act though getting to play them and enjoy them but also try to maintain perspective and make sure to take the time out to write about them.
As games have developed it's been an interesting seeing how the now outdated Java games have given way to games which we've become more familiar with on iPods and iPhones etc. It's amazing seeing how games which were starting to lag and age badly have become as good as what we play on consoles and PC's at home. Let's just hope that the battery life for the iPod will improve as much as the appearance and content of the games!

Birthday's improve with age!

It's funny hitting a milestone such as your 30th birthday, you'd think that by now I'd have a better idea about what I want and so on but actually it seems less and less like the case as the years roll by. Take for example your 18th birthday, there's such a hype about it and expectations run so high that if it doesn't seem to end up with someone (or usually quite a few) being particularly ill for the next few days and perhaps someone ending up in A&E, it isn't classed a success.. then there's the 21st which seems to be largely in the same vain as the 18th (and no doubt the years in-between).
Maybe it's me getting a little older and possibly wiser, but the days of drinking and staying out until the small hours seem less appealing and having quality time with those I love and having good company is much more important - and besides, it's nice being able to remember the event afterwards!
As this is my second or third year here in London it's also a bit like being spoilt for choice but restricted by circumstances. Sure I could blow a hole in my wallet but I don't wish to be stuck with debt either - now I really do feel old! HAHA!

Seeking the light in something so harrowing... the loss of a child

It's tragic news to report that my cousin's baby died in its 18th week of pregnancy. I usually try to find something positive to say in any situation but it seems so senseless to lose someone who hadn't even had a chance to draw its first breath.
With a small sense of irony, I'd not been too decided one way or another about the recent story in Eastenders but having a child pass away closer to home makes you have a moment of clarity about it all and although circumstances are different, making entertainment out of something as traumatic as this is at best bad taste and at worst utterly undefendable to criticism.
Right now all our prayers and thoughts are with you little one and to my cousin and the family at such a solemn time.

What's all this blogging about?

I'm rather amused to say that despite being quite a web-savvy user, I've never posted a blog. With a sense of irony, being a journalist and having had quite a few articles published here there and everywhere, it struck me as a bit of an oversight that I have given a voice to all of those I've written about but somehow lost my own voice in the process - so I'm going to put that right starting here!
As with any learning curve, there's bound to be some errors made along the way and probably one or two things that will need to be ironed out but this is all part of the fun and I'm sure my followers (as and when I may be fortunate enough to have them) will be able to point out things and help this blog develop into something that proves very interesting and worthwhile following!

I intend to write about the experiences I've had, dilemmas encountered (either as a neutral journalist or in life), and just about anything else which I would like to write about and of course aim to reply to any questions posted!